In Love You See Through God’s Eyes

When you’re in love with someone, he/she is perfect. His every word displays his vast knowledge. Everything he does is so very kind. His looks make you tremble. You wouldn’t want to be anywhere else and you wouldn’t want anyone else.

Then time goes on and you realize they’re just as flawed as you are…

 
But, the beautiful thing is, that when you’re head over heels for someone, you catch a glimpse of how God sees them and intended them to be. It is like a rare look into how God created everything.

The crazy thing is that, that is how God sees you all the time. Without fault, perfectly beautiful.

Is Time Off the Purpose of Life?

I recently came across a newspaper article, where the writer’s opinion was that you shouldn’t get into a profession that requires “a calling”, because that kind of work doesn’t pay  well. Instead if you “want to do good”, do it on your time off.

I have never understood how people actually choose professions based on the pay level.  In elementary school  a class mate announced, that she was going to become a doctor when she grows up, because it pays well. I also don’t understand that people would decide on a career, because of the amount of time off. Both reasons seem so trivial. If you spend 8 hours a day (or longer) doing something that you  hate or dislike, but roll in the dough or those long summer breaks; really, is it worth it?

Is the purpose of working to get rich and to have time off? Let me specify,  is the purpose of life to have much money and time off to spend it?

If you think about it, this is a very hedonistic, self-centered and vain way of thinking. Yet, it is the default truth of our Western society. If all we do with our lives is satisfy our own needs and desires, what about other people? What about the obvious suffering in our world? What if you are not the center of the world? And why are rich people unhappy?

What if the purpose of life is exactly the opposite? What if it is about finding what you love and are good at, and doing that  whether it pays well or not? What if the center of your life should be everyone else and not you? What if that brought you the most pleasure? Because, shockingly, it can.

Overcoming

I own a very old car that periodically needs maintenance. Sometimes because people have tried to break in damaging the lock, or at times just because it is old and the wiring is worn out and the headlights keep flicking on and off all night killing the battery. I have named the vehicle after an old man, because of its quirks.

You get the point.

I am not a car mechanic and tend to get very frustrated every time something goes wrong and needs to be fixed, because most often I have no idea how to fix it. So about once a month I curse the car to the deepest Hades, only to remember to be grateful a few moments later, to even own a car.

After the moment of desperation I somehow have always been able to get the problem fixed whether with the help of a mechanic, a male member of the family or a trip to the junk yard to scavenge a spare part.

My old-man-car has taught me perseverance. I have been able to overcome every obstacle and learned a thing or two about car maintenance (or at least that most mechanics like to help a woman in distress) and found that you can deal with a lot more than you thought you could. So, give it up to an old piece of metal on wheels.

Successful Failure

To succeed in life you need to fail.

It seems to be God’s number one training tool for such Biblical personalities as Adam & Eve (banished from the garden of Eden to live the consequences of failing to trust God), Moses (son of a princess, spent 40 years herding sheep in the desert after he took matters into his own hands and killed a man), Joseph (showed off his future calling to the annoyance of his brothers who sold him as a slave), Jonah (decided to run instead of obey and spent three days inside a whale) and the list goes on.

Modern day successes have had their dark times too. Lucille Ball was dismissed from drama school. The Beatles were turned down by a record company who said, “guitar music is on its way out” and Michael Jordan didn’t make it to his high school basketball team.

These stories could have ended here. Instead they picked themselves up and learned from their failures. Actually failing only proves that you have tried.

Go out and be a a successful failure today!

To Get Rid of Suffering We Have to Get Rid of People

If God is good, why does he allow so much suffering? This rhetorical question is a way of denying God’s existence for many.

Consider this thought.

The earth is suffering under the curse of sin, and if God being good means that he needs to remove sin from this world, then he would have to get rid of sinners. And he is too merciful to do that. (Joni Eareckson Tada)

When we think of suffering we think of us as victims and other, truly evil people as the perpetrators. But on the nanolevel all of us cause suffering. “Take the log out of your own eye before trying to remove a stick from your neighbor’s,” said Jesus. It is an uncomfortable realization that even I contribute to the general feeling of the human kind: “if God is so good, how come there’s so much evil?”

It is much easier to shift the blame on God while we walk free. Truly honest people are willing to take a look into their own hearts and deal with the yucky stuff.

 

Life’s Not Meant to Be Guarded But Lived

We try to live safe. We try not to get hurt. We avoid making mistakes.

Yet when three men were given talents, the one who dug his talents into the ground was rebuked.  He was the one who thought he was making the best decision by protecting what he was given. He ended up being the fool. The other two who took risks and invested their talents to some degree were congratulated.

Jesus didn’t stay at home and marvel at all the power he had. Instead he went and spent it all. For us. If God does that, what does it say to us?

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”
— Hunter S. Thompson

It Feels So Good When You Just Make It

Some people are motivated by stress. They think and act quickly and accurately when the right amount of pressure is applied. If there is too much wiggle room they get nothing done. It is like driving on a very narrow one way street with high walls on both sides with someone chasing you. You have to keep going faster, because you cannot turn around and there are no exits.

I have always admired my mother and friends who finish tasks right away, way ahead of the deadline. I have tried to imitate them, without success. I am more like my father who accomplishes an un-imaginable amount of work in the last minutes, hours or days before the deadline.

The sad thing is that every time you succeed in just missing the deadline, you grow bolder! The next time around you push it more and cut it with even a smaller margin. Is it the adrenaline rush?

By now I have learned not to try to fix me, but rather maximize the benefits of this style of working. I need to put myself under stress to get anything done. Working as a writer and with TV is ideal, because the stress is real as are the deadlines. I don’t know what to do about the “growing bolder”-thing though. Maybe one day I’ll burn so bad that I will learn my lesson.

Dressed As a Boy, An Afghan Girl Has Freedom

Boys are prized and girls despised in the Afghan society. When you give birth to a girl the family weeps over your “failure” to produce a boy. In families with only daughters it is somewhat common to dress a girl as a boy, bacha posh, to gain stature in the eyes of others. Guests won’t have to feel sorry for your family anymore.

In a New York Times article several families with girl-boys are interviewed. The little “boy” has her hair cut short and wears boys clothes. He/she has the freedom to work, help out in the family store for example, run errands, escort his/her sisters in public places, study further and so on. It is common that when the bacha posh reaches puberty he/she will return to being a girl and her marriage will be arranged. When you have lived as a boy through your childhood and then suddenly are expected to be a girl, it can be a huge challenge. Many of the ladies in their 3o´s who have been bacha posh remember those days as the high light of their lives.The apparent reason being; having had more freedom as a boy.

How does this kind of a practice influence a person’s identity? If you’re a girl, grown up as a boy and then changed back to a girl, a woman – how can you have a healthy female identity? In a culture where women are truly ill-treated, being dressed up as a boy is understandable. Interestingly enough in this article it was the wife’s idea to dress up their girl as a boy.

Only men do not need to be educated on the value of women. Women themselves need to understand their value and beauty as women. Easier said than done.

Beat Yourself

I’m learning that the biggest obstacle to reaching something new is you. You want to step up to a new level , but you have to first have enough faith to take the first step. You have to come face to face with who you believe you are and who you believe God is.

People who have gone on to do great things have had the courage to ask for the unthinkable.

Too often we are bound by

I do not know how

How could I ever be there?

I am not good enough

They would never take me seriously

Where will the money come from?

And so on. At the same time you hopefully feel the urge to keep going, to try again and harder to not give up. Because maybe your dream is the next big thing. Maybe it will change world.

I’ve been battling with my fears and insecurities this week as I’ve made some crazy phone calls asking for things that freak me out. I am excited and scared at the same time. Something keeps pushing me and I cannot give up.

On Finding that Guy (or Girl)

To all my single people out there:

I couldn’t agree more with these posts by Don Miller : what women and men really need.

He says women don’t want an insecure guy or a weak guy. “Intuitively, they know they have eggs inside them that, eventually, are going to become little children, and they are looking for a mate who can provide for them and their eggs.” (Which made me laugh out loud, but true.) He says on the importance of having a life: “My friend John Eldredge says you should be on an adventure, and you should invite them into that adventure.” Which also, so true. Girls want to go somewhere with a guy.

Sometimes  good Christian girls think they need to appear to be weak and vulnerable to be attractive. I think Miller quite rightly points out that weakness only attracts people who will hurt you. What is attractive on the other hand is confidence. “It’s important to note that a strong, confident woman is what a guy needs, but it’s not always what a guy wants.” Which again is spot on. Ironically all of us often want things/people that are not good for us. Thankfully you become wiser the older you get…

To all my choosy women out there, it’s good to be choosy and to know what your worth. And what you want.

So, what I came away with was that if you (guys and girls) don’t have a vision for your life, get one. Then you’ll stand a chance finding a good relationship also.